THIS! Boys and girls is the reason I live and breathe. Shit like this makes my insides all warm and fuzzy.As I exited the #3 this afternoon, a loud noise consumes the echoing walls of San Diego's 4th avenue.... "Maaaaaaaaaaaaaarjoriiiiiie!" I had already scoped out the nut who was perched in her three-wheeler outside the city's dumpiest hostel, but the poor pedestrians never saw it coming. Miss Lady pulls her right hand out from behind her back and reveals Marjorie, her 3 foot tall, hand-stuffed baby. She gives us fierceness with glasses only to be found in the rabbit hole otherwise known as Elton John's closet. And the madness continues, "I've been looking for you all day! Where have you been Marge?! I need my fucking pills and if I don't get them YOU know what happens."
A group of scantily clad girls walk by, "Don't dress like a whore Marge!" Miss Lady pulls a plastic bag out from her jacket, opens it up and spits.... She seals the bag, stuffs it bag in her pocket and screams through the mouth of Marjorie, "Only better to screw you with, slut!" The girls run across to the safe side where I am rolling outside the U.S. Grant Hotel and trying my damnedest to zoom in on the most incredible street performance I've seen since Kris Angel in Vegas... Miss Lady digresses and either passed out or fell asleep in her three wheeling travelling show wheelchair.
She is officially my new favorite person.
© Joseph Tighe 2010
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